Deep

The monster unleashed--
yet again.
It snarls and bites inside of me,
calls me names,
explains I'm no good.
My insides heave,
and I feel sick.
I don't know how to escape,
how to rid myself
of this demon.
I smile and think happy thoughts
but it seems my
magic dust was stolen.
I get up,
try to plug my ears,
but he growls within
that nothing I do
will make a difference.
I'm worthless and
my life means nothing.
I know I need to
pick up my Bible.
It's sitting and waiting,
longing for me
to reach out
and caress its pages
with my eyes.
I know it contains
true joy.
I reach out
but something
pulls my hand back,
and makes me wonder
if I really want
to end this slum of
depression.