Speechless

Speechless--
but not from awe.
Paralyzed within--
I feel like a quadriplegic
when it comes to prayer.
Stuck in my throat--
a huge clog--
I can't seem to spew it out.
I don't understand--
I can feel you--
the words just won't come.
I'm a marble statue--
frozen in the grave--
my emotions still--
my lips set in stone.
My heart knows the
letters--
sees them forming into words--
but no cry is uttered.
Can you hear me?
Why is there this wall?
Who built it?
I can't see you!
I can't hear!
I can't feel!
I long to turn the pages--
read your love notes,
but my mind is a steel trap--
commandeering my hands--
making them completely useless.
I fall into empty sleep,
gaining no wisdom,
stuck in the same relentless cycle.
My soul longs for you--
I feel so dry,
so empty,
so confused
and worthless.
I know what I need to do,
but I don't have the strength--
the power to lift a finger--
I can't make a motion.
I'm frozen,
Paralyzed.
Speechless.